Adventures & Insights

One man's adventures in the physical and intellectual worlds…

It’s How Big?! You Must Be Trippin’!

If you’ve been keeping up with my friend The Good Greatsby (if you ask him, he’ll deny it – that’s just one of our in-jokes…) you’ll have seen that he recently revealed some startling truths about my fair country, Australia. One of these truths is that we have a collection of BIG THINGS that you can visit to make your trip to Australia even more memorable. Of course, if you are planning to visit Australia and want to make it the most memorable thing you’ll ever do, involve me. You will not regret it. (Well, I won’t regret it. I can make THAT promise.)

Today though, I’ve realised that I have been a terrible Australian. Or should I say – a shockin’ Aussie. Because that’s only 4 syllables, rather than 7. For all the big things that we have for your visual pleasure, I have seen woefully few of these grand works. Luckily, I am in a very good position to turn this around and regain my Aussie pride. I have decided to embark upon a road trip. Initially planned to just be a casual drive back to Cairns en route to Japan, I have now decided that I will make the trip much more interesting by stopping to visit as many big things as possible along the way.

I’ve been on many road trips up and down the East Coast of Australia; most of them have been with my family and have been made with the sole purpose of visiting friends and relatives. It will be fun to just drive for a week with the intention of seeing some massive, gaudy works of local art in the name of patriotism. Now all I need is a couple of companions and a dog and I’ll know how John Travolta felt when he played the archangel Michael in the movie of the same name.  America may well have the World’s largest non-stick frypan, but the Aussies have the World’s largest Redback Spider!

Of course, there are some big things that will be less than interesting to see (like the Big Potato, for example), but I think that it’s my civic duty to bear witness to these creations (or monstrosities) in the light of day. I’ll commit only to seeing as many of the Queensland big things as I can though; it would be foolish of me to take on a promise as big as seeing every big thing in Australia before I know what I’m getting into.

So, I have three spare seats in the Mazda and there will be road trip songs, petrol station pit-stops and junk food aplenty. Who’s with me?!

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15 responses to “It’s How Big?! You Must Be Trippin’!

  1. edrevets February 25, 2012 at 12:42 am

    Did you leave yet? I want to go. Pay for my plane fair to get there? I’m already in Cairo, so it’s relatively closer than other places.

  2. therosebandit February 8, 2012 at 1:17 am

    That is one big spud!!! I take up half the space of an adult so if there is no room when you are making the “pick ups” you can just strap me to the roof or you know… :) What’s your favorite Junk food?? I will need something to convince you to take the “muppet map” to come all they way to the states to pick me up hehe.

  3. Renée A. Schuls-Jacobson February 6, 2012 at 9:43 am

    I love big things! IYKWIM. I would love to hop in your Mazda and see all things Australian. ;-)

  4. skippingstones February 4, 2012 at 12:24 pm

    I thought of you when I read his post. Specifically, I thought, “but Christian doesn’t talk that way” (can I admit that I feel a little gypped?) and I had an image of you batting away the flies while singing carols around the pool at Christmas (okay, that one got away from me a bit) and then there are the gigantic spiders, not to mention that potato… The question is why are you so secretive?

    Also, I’ll drive.

    And also too, I really like Reese, Thoughtsy. I’d even be willing to put them on frozen yogurt (if you need some more letters cut out, just let me know – I can send you some of mine).

  5. thoughtsappear February 3, 2012 at 11:55 pm

    I don’t have to drive, do I? I’ll make up for it by supplying more junk food.

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